hate
|
Kuchingnitism part 1
Sunday, August 10, 2008

jeng jeng jeng.....i am here to talk about Malaysianism or Kuchingnism or both gahhh.my facts are as reliable as your grandmother with Alzheimer's disease. this will be a rather long one so grab a bag (of anything...we're aiming for creativity here) and read on.

Australia


Now Kuchingnites have a peculiar little obsession with the country its unhealthy. Particularly Perth for some apparent reason i have yet to uncover. They have like a little underground community down there.Many would get their PR status approved and move to Australia to settle down.is it the accent?the kangaroo meat?now i will inevitably study there in a couple of years to come but i will certainly not stop there.understandably, its the cheapest choice for us Malaysians or Kuchingnites to immerse and dwell together with blonde haired,blue eyed 6feet tall "ang mo"'s compared to say the US or UK.i'm going off in a tangent here but we also love our Bali.(fyi, one way flights to Bali via Air Asia from Kuching will stop by the 26th of August.i think.don't quote me.)


Blogs

yes blogging.it has spread like a bloody epidemic for the past 2 years or so now.(me included) no Kuchingnite is cool if they don't own a blog.no way hozey.lol. You get extra points if you talk about our local politics once in a while.that way, people will think you're tech savvy AND concerned about the declining state of the country.hoorah!(it helps if you support opposition) now you don't need good english to succeed in blogging, you just have to look good,born with a camera embedded to your arm and perhaps a dictionary.im not going to comment on where my blog stands.=/ and oh don't get me started on the never ending drama clouding the oh so cool "blogsphere".im looking at you Dawn Yang and Xiaxue.


Fusion Zen Inspired Chillout spots/Restaurants

Now just walk along the Padungan,Travillion or 3rd Exchange area and you'll get what i mean.Tao (RIP now called The Grill), Bing!, BlaBlaBla, The Junk, Exza, Frappe and the list goes on and on.not to mention Atmosfera located opposite The Spring shopping mall and Jase Tea House near Choice Premier.

A picture of Tao.it is literally littered with images of Buddha.trying too hard to create that Zen feeling.oh but i love their Lasagna.=) too bad it closed down and changed to The Grill.i heard the owners are the same people tho.=/



Bing! it functions quite similarly to Tao.without the excess Buddhaness.lately they have been organizing Open Mic nights here on every other Friday.i plan on performing during one of these nights.and you bet I'm going to blog about it.

...and this is Frappe.so all these cafes,restaurants whatnot all have very similar themes and structural design.simple but contemporary furniture,pseudo fusion east meets west cuisine,grade A Starbucks ripoff coffee beverages bla bla bla (pun not intented)


Ah Beng Chias

or ABC as some could call it are well translated in English as Ah Beng cars/rides whichever your fancy.the most favourite choice of mobility for Ah Bengs would certainly be the Perodua Kenari.


why Ah Beng?why do you subject yourself to such basphemy??

Now that you are able to identify an Ah Beng mobile, the next step is to never get into an accident with one.because if you do, it will unfold like an arithmetic progression ok.the ah beng will call his geng, then his geng call his other geng ok then call another geng sumore.bombarding you will shouts of broken english most probably.oh and they have parangs to boot.a dangerous combination.=/



stay tuned for part 2.